17 Aug 2015

As we all experience anger from time to time, maybe in the form of fleeting annoyance or as a full-fledged rage. It is true that problems at work or in personal relationships can cause anger, it is equally true that un-controlled anger can be the cause of problems at work or in personal relationship.

Have you learned to recognize the difference between anger which flares up, and threatens to disturb the peace of the environment and people around, vis-à-vis anger which is controlled and targeted for completion of desired work.

I remember being told a story of a highly evolved saint, who because of his awareness of his emotions was always in a feel good state. For years no one had heard him getting annoyed or feeling disturbed in anyway, so on a day when he was talking with his voice reasonable raised, everyone around was quite surprised.

Beautiful thing to note though is that as soon as he finished what he had to say, to whom he has to say, he went back in just a few micro seconds to being the jovial self he was known for.

That is the power of having awareness of your emotions and being able to channelize it appropriately. Here are simple techniques to manage your state or have a more balanced approach:

  1. Reframe anger into humor..
    Learn not to take everything seriously. Imagine the person you are getting angry at as the fictitious character with entertaining qualities that you love the most, and let your anger bubble up in giggles. (This is not to disrespect but to manage your state, so that you can respond appropriately)
  2. Interrupt the anger cycle
    As you are more and more aware of your feelings everyday, notice when anger is rising in you, right then know you are the master of how you feel, and interrupt the flow of anger right there. Like change your physiology, breathing pattern etc.
  3. Trust yourself
    Trust yourself, you are powerful, powerful beyond words, you hold within yourself the energy build up when you get angry. Use the energy to get outstanding results
  4. Listen More
    Listen, listen, listen, the effect of listening cannot be overemphasized. Research proves that most often anger flares up because of perceived hearing. Pay more attention & ask your question with clarity & curiosity, you will realize that the number of times you are angry has gone down drastically
  5. Let go of anger before you sleep
    It is important to sleep with a happy, peaceful thought. If you catch yourself going to sleep angry, bring all your focus to your breadth, count each inflow & outflow, till you are no longer conscious of the count, remaining aware of the flow. Getting into the peaceful zone, relax, goto sleep to wake up fresh with renewed energy & answers.

AlphaStars BestLife NLP Process Coach and Trainers with 22+ years of authentic NLP experience in India, providing NLP training as per international standards and certification licensed by Dr. Richard Bandler, co-creator of NLP.

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